9 Ways You Can Use To Comfort Someone Who Lost a Loved One Through Text

The pain of losing a loved one is the worst feeling ever.

It feels like someone cut you open and all of your insides fell out. You should be dead. But you’re still alive.

You are not in physical pain. But you don’t notice it because you are in agony. Your world is over. It’s almost too much to bear for one person. Your brain is like scrambled eggs and you cease all function.

You wait for you to just stop existing. For your systems to give out. You wait. And you wait. And wait some more. Until you realize that you will not cease. And little by little, you crawl your way back into the world.

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If you have someone in life who is in pain or grieving here are the 9 Ways You Can Use To Comfort Someone Who Lost a Loved One Through Text:

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1."I heard the news, my friend. I can’t even begin to understand what you are feeling, but I want you to know that I’m here for you. I’m sending you my prayers and condolences. I’ll be checking in on you to see how you are doing."

Your friend might not be ready to talk to you when the news first hits, but they need to know that you are available whenever they are ready.

Do what you say you will, by following up at appropriate intervals to check up on your friend.

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2."I’m sorry for your loss. Please accept my sincerest sympathy."

Sometimes less is more. When you don’t know what to say to your friend, a text acknowledging what they’re going through is enough when the message is sincere and heartfelt. 

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3."God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Thinking of you, dear friend! Sending my hugs!"

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Let your friend feel that God is always there in times of need. He may give us challenges in life but he will never forsake us. 

4."We may be miles apart but I'm with you in heart and spirit."

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Although you are far away from each other you have to let them feel that your presence is always there. Make them feel that you sympathize with them, know what they’re going through and that you care about them.

Texting is not the ideal way to reach out to someone who is grieving, but sometimes it's the most appropriate manner of condolences based on varying sets of circumstances. When you can't be there in person to offer your comfort and support, and your communication is typically done via text, reaching out by text is far better than not reaching out at all.

5."I know that you're going through a tough time. I also went through this. I'm going to check in with you."

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Letting someone know that you're going to check in with them here and there is a solid way to comfort them. It's difficult to reach out when you're feeling bad. Having someone know you'll be there to check in with them can provide a certain level of comfort.

6."I'm here to listen and talk whenever you need, even if that's a year from now."

                                                                   Panvola Mugs

When someone is in pain, chances are they need to talk. How do you comfort someone who is grieving?

How to Help Someone Who Is Grieving

They need to talk and talk because every time they talk they process because every time they talk they untangle because every time they talk they forgive themselves a tiny bit more for the role they believe they played in this horrible thing that has happened to them.

You don’t need to do anything. You don’t need to fix or help or adjust or clarify. You don’t need to console.

What you need is to clear your calendar. What you need is to push everything else aside. What you need is to listen, just listen, and either intently, soundlessly think or even say out loud — there is no limit.

There is no limit to the amount of time I am willing to sit here and listen to you.

7."I'm running errands, can I pick anything up for you?"

Be as available and present as possible. Make sure they're taking care of themselves. Don't assume someone else is checking upon them. See if they've eaten. If you're going to pick up groceries for yourself, text your friend. They might want a chocolate bar or just to know that you're thinking of them.

8."If you need someone to talk to, I’m here for you."

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Don’t give up if they say, “No” at first. Just keep checking in.

Tell them, “I don’t know how you feel, but my heart goes out to you and I wish I could comfort you. Please talk to me about your loved one if that would make you feel better. What are your happiest memories?” or, if you knew the person who passed away, you could share the happy memories you have of them with your grieving friend. Ask them if you can spend some time together just to have a chat over coffee and let them know they don’t have to keep up a front to cover their true feelings. Tell them they are important to you and keep showing up and calling after the initial shock wears off and everyone else has gone back to carry on with their lives. If you have lost a loved one, share the feelings you had for that person to help them feel comfortable opening up.

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9. "If you need anything please let me know, you can count on me."

Keep your word. Don't tell them you'll be there if you really won't. 

If it's a woman who's lost her husband, offer to do the things her husband might have done for his chores. Take the garbage out. Reach some things that are high up or lift some things that may be too heavy for her. Take her car for an oil change. Help with her lawn.

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If it's a parent that lost their spouse, offer to take their kids off their hands for a bit. Help their kid with homework if you can. They need a break from their kids to work on LIFE.

Gently motivate them to get back to living. Take them to dinner. Take them to the grocery store. Take them for coffee. 

The things that comfort them won't just be words. Actually, there aren't any words that they've not already heard and they're all overused.

Show them you care by your actions. They'll be forever grateful.